Lesson Plan September

September 2017- Don’t let your Pedagogy hit your ass on your way through in the classroom door.

The Colleagues Talk 2.0

Kafka on Kampus

  (for K)

As he was pulling out the parking slot on a sweltering Thursday noon

His colleague came running up flagging him down waving his arms

With this wild look in his eyes and breathlessly exclaimed

The administration has sold the naming rights to the college ! 

 He immediately pulled back in and cut the motor

Got out and stood before him and replied- say what ?

 

Catching his wind gasped that’s rightthe bastards just posted the news

On Prof talk- it’s official starting this Fall Semester this school is

Now named Kafka Kollege –a yes that’s Kollege w/ a GD K

 

No Shit he remarked are you kidding me ?

 

His colleague shook his head emphatically and continued……

 

And that’s not the half of it- all of the buildings on Kampus have been renamed

As well as part of the agreement-

All the Dorms are now called The Penal Colony

The Kampus Center is The Castle

The Theater Department is The Hunger Artist

Academic Affairs? The Judgment

English ? Parables & Paradoxes

Science ? The Metamorphosis

Public Safety ?-Before the Law

Human  Resources ?   The Trial

Student Affairs ? Give it up

 

We stood in stunned silence sweating in the oppressive summer heat

Then my colleague broke into this really strange serine smile

And purred out-

But I do have some rather good news-

Seems all the Administrators, Deans & Chairs even the President

Have been transformed into Ungeheuer Ungeziefers( literally “monstrous vermin”)

like Cockroaches and Dung Beetles

and are hiding in their offices under the desks.

Uncollected  8/2017

*

– Just what the hell is it I do for a living ?  Revisions pending

my-students

Why Johnny Can’t Think

(the blind folds are now I- phones think cyber medication )

At four they put them on
the Soporifiquil
That made them more “manageable”
in Mrs. Heyman Smallmotor’s Day Care.

Trouble was the nightmares,
at first.
Then that thing with forks
and the wall sockets.

Next medication adjustment was right before Kindergarten.
The prescription was changed to 175 grams of Confuseadril

Again.
Mixed results.
Very polite, cooperative and pliant,
but needed the script for the Preventidrool
to take the edge of the Confusdril.

They stabilized somewhat through early grade school years.
Teacher’s regularly remarked on their ability to
“free associate” in finger paint.
However the introduction of Maladroitin (with Chondroitin)
Seemed to reintroduce “extended lucid periods”

Naturally the onslaught on Puberty
and Jr. High presented some “special challenges.”

The consulting team agreed that perhaps 250 CC of
Benumbitussin might counter act some the more aggressive
tendencies but only if alternated with Mindbenderine
every other week.

This seemed to do the trick.
And no further “episodes” were reported
throughout the secondary school years
which were successfully completed with the achievement of a GED credential.

Today Johnny has little/no lingering effects from development medication.
An aggressive regimen of Psudointellextuol, Ennuigra (with Tedium),
and Phenaminafenafinaphen all see to that,

-Greetings from Gridville

 

 

 

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